A Dustland Fairytale

Once upon a time...

...there was a beautiful princess named Amanda. She loved pretty dresses and sunglasses and ponies and punk rock. But she had a secret. Every night when the sun set, Amanda turned into a toothy and terrifying AMANDASAURUS REX! Miss Rex's blog is much more interesting and frequently updated than this one, so I advise you to proceed there... IF YOU DARE.

Weekends are for the Warriors!


Wow what a weekend it has been! And the longest one I can remember having all year. I have finally discovered the secret to slowing down the racing rapids of time: NO SLEEP! Haha. But truly. Friday feels like a lifetime ago. I had lunch with Gill and Cara that day, which was great because I hadn't seen either of them in over a week and that is unacceptable for summertime. But I was sick most of the week so it was really all right. Paul and I had a date that night and I made him take me to see "Up," which was amazing! Just the right amount of goofy and random mixed with totally adorable. Even Paul managed to like it, though at first he was like "NO. We're not seeing that." Win!

Saturday, Cara and I helped one of my former teachers throw a custom birthday party. Holy cow. Any family that can afford that for their daughter has to really be raking it in. It's a catered event, and when I say catered I mean there are sandwiches cut in hearts, stars, and crown shapes, shoe shaped cookies, and cupcakes adorned with massive frosting flowers and butterflies. Sharon (it's weird for me to suddenly call her by her first name after being her student) brings costumes and puppets. She sings and plays games. I mean WOW. I would've loved to have Princess Sharon throw me a party as a little girl. But I don't think we were ever that rich.

It was a long drive there and back, during which Cara and I had significant discussions about some of life's bigger issues. Things are a-changing, we noted; our discussions, which once circled around Pokemon and schoolgirl crushes (and schoolgirl crushes on Pokemon characters... I mean... that never happened XD), have shifted to anything from work to booze to sex to families (the ones we have now and the ones we will start in the not-as-distant-as-it-once-was future). Sometimes I hate that I'm growing up, but other times I think about it and realize that I have always been content no matter what age I've been. I think you grow into the number. But age IS just a number. Even if you're dealing with different issues than you used to, it doesn't mean you have to be grown up in every sense, and I don't think I ever will be (just wait til you hear how we spent the rest of the weekend if you don't believe me). However, adults need to behave like adults when they are in families and relationships and stop acting like nobody else matters. Their thoughtless selfishness scars the people they ought to care about and that's unacceptable.

Okay, random tangent, sorry. That night we went to Paul's for a movie night. I don't know when we will learn that he's the wrong one to send to Blockbuster. I felt bad that I'd dragged him to a kids' movie about a house that travels by balloon power so I didn't argue, even though the back of the movie was fraught with terrible grammar and spelling, which should've been enough to clue us all in to the quality of the thing. I mean talk about no plot, disturbing (if not especially graphic) violence/sex for absolutely no reason, terrible acting, terrible writing, and terrible cinematography. Even Paul hated it, and he picked it.

Then Cara and I drove to the other end of the world to swim in Gill's pool. I was glad to have something to do all night, since in spite of my sickness I'd been struck with pretty bad insomnia for the past couple of nights. We had to take a long, dark, winding detour because 3A was shut down for a few miles. Got there at 1AM. The pool was deliciously warm and we were at that silly, happy point of tiredness that I've missed for quite some time. Quote of the night: "I wonder if I can stretch both of my legs without blubbbjihaiewhfjasdnfl." The answer, Gill, is you can't.

After swimming, we went to the 24-hour Wal*Mart to buy ice cream. It was 3AM. Gill and Cara had to sit in the car seats and dance about in silly galoshes. Then they bought sippy cups to drink their Mountain Dew out of. Cara did Cher impressions on the car ride home while Gill sang like the old man in Teen Girl Squad who has the running gag about ointment. Then we devoured the gallon of white mint chocolate chip ice cream, drank allegedly citrus flavored soda out of baby cups, and watched Pokemon until we fell asleep.

Only two hours had gone by when Gill's mother came in to complain about us sleeping in the living room, open all the shades and proceed to do something in the kitchen that involved a suspicious number of pots and pans. So I got up and left. I had to be at church to videotape the sermon anyway. No matter that I was almost an hour ahead of schedule. Somehow I made myself look alive, went to the service, and filmed the thing, averting the slight disaster of not getting shit for audio and having to awkwardly run around the sanctuary trying to fix things. I looked after the pastor's son for a few hours while most of the congregation went to a wedding and then joined Paul and Mama Swede for dinner.

I really appreciate that she always feeds us when we go there and I will never complain about that. But apparently my body forgot how to digest ham, because I felt awful when we left for Gill's. Still, I went swimming with everybody (meaning Gill, Cara, Paul and Tony, except Paul wouldn't get in because he didn't have a swimsuit), laughed at the awkwardness that is my friends, tried some of the beer that Paul snatched from his Mom's fridge (which is really lame since he's old enough to buy his own), and went to Wal*Mart again to get noms. It was fun, but I don't remember a whole lot of details. My brain was beyond functioning. I probably said/did retarded things that made no sense, like even worse than usual. I remember I was jumpy because I kept imagining that I saw people out of the corner of my eye. Every time I blinked it felt like I had been startled out of a light sleep. If I stayed awake beyond midnight, it wasn't by much.

I had to bring Paul back for work this morning. Gill and Cara still hadn't slept when I left. I crashed the second I got home and slept for four glorious hours. Still not feeling quite human but it was all worth it. =)

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