A Dustland Fairytale

Once upon a time...

...there was a beautiful princess named Amanda. She loved pretty dresses and sunglasses and ponies and punk rock. But she had a secret. Every night when the sun set, Amanda turned into a toothy and terrifying AMANDASAURUS REX! Miss Rex's blog is much more interesting and frequently updated than this one, so I advise you to proceed there... IF YOU DARE.

Atlas


Everyone famous is dying, and frankly I don't blame them. I don't want to care, I don't want to fight, I don't want the government taking my money for its delusional purposes. I don't want to have to do anything that doesn't seem right. I want to do what's important to me without being beholden to people, least of all institutions. God I hate institutions.

If everyone famous walked off a cliff, would you follow?

Maybe.

I want to live for something. I want the parameters of my faith to be clear. I want a singular, concrete quest with a singular, concrete goal and I want it to define my actions, my life, myself.

I want the world to be different but I don't know how to change it. There's an ocean of problems and I am paralyzed. Too much is wrong. It's not me and people vs. the world; it's me vs. people vs. the world. I feel like Atlas, breaking under the weight of the universe (or the weight of my own, cancerous little universe growing leaden on my shoulders).

It's nobody's place to solve things - yet it's everybody's place, and so many of us do nothing. Even me. We can put all the band-aids we want on this broken world, but sooner or later someone has to do a heart transplant. We are not surgeons, so we do nothing.

"I am a living, breathing hell; come on and resurrect me."

4 comments:

Mr. Paul said...

The Dawn of Battle!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J1b_9A2EFyA

Listen to the Lyrics

Amandasaurus said...

Was that supposed to mitigate my existential torment? I mean... it was good, but not THAT good.

emily said...

I'm with you...sort of. I'm not sure how much you've read on my blog, so for the sake of filling you in- I'm a social worker. I totally get this weight of the world issue. But, after years of achy shoulders from carrying all that weight I came to this beautiful conclusion. You can't save the world...you can save one person's world...for them, there is no difference. Think about it. If we all put energy into saving the worlds of one person or a few...big things would happen.

Just a thought.

And, thank you so much for your comments. I truly appreciate them. They make my day.

Secretia Teller said...

This post is actually beautifully poetic, thanks for writing it!

Secretia